1. Every hour you spend doing Thing right now is an extra hour you will get to sleep. (◡‿◡✿)
2. Every hour you spend doing Thing right now is an extra hour you will get to read or talk with friends or watch that new episode of your favourite TV show or do something else you really love doing. ヽ(‘ ∇‘ )ノ
3. You will have to do Thing eventually whether you like it or not! Face Thing head-on and get it over with. You will look back and say to yourself, wow, I am so glad I did Thing three hours ago. ∩( ・ω・)∩
4. You will spend the same amount of time doing Thing whether you do Thing now or at 4am. You might as well get Thing done earlier! ≧(´▽｀)≦
5. Every time you do not do Thing or do Thing really late when you’re tired and cranky and stressed out, that inevitably makes you feel really sad and angry at yourself. If you do Thing now, you can avoid that stress and crankiness. Future you will be happy! °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°
6. It is midnight in a scary house and all of a sudden you see Thing! It is huge and frightening and it has lots of teeth and you want to run away and hide. But then Thing meows and you realize that Thing was just a little kitty cat and you were seeing its shadow reflected on the wall. You should not dread doing Thing because your mind has made it seem a lot bigger and scarier than it actually is. Once you start working on Thing, you will realize how silly it is to make huge scary monsters out of kitty cats! ヽ(‘ ∇‘ )ノ
7. Do not curl up into a ball and think about how horrible you are for not getting Thing done earlier! You are not alone. We all do it! Procrastination is a normal part of life. It is alright. For now, try to stay positive and just focus on starting to do Thing. It will be okay. (*´・ｖ・)
8. Stop every half hour and remind yourself of all the reasons why you should not procrastinate and do Thing earlier. I promise you that you will be able to gather the courage to do Thing. Good luck! (´ω｀★)
my brain is so fucking weird though like
I’m 30% sure that at some point in my life I’m going to have another transcendent experience except instead of going away in 30-50 minutes like the last one did it’s gonna stick with me. And I will officially have to be admitted to a mental institution.
We’d just like to give you a present for your birthday and your graduation—
(nonono just because they’re in the same month doesn’t mean you get to smush them together I am very poor and I would like two presents thank you very much one twenty dollar amazon gift card is nice but)
—so here’s a check for $500.
???? / /??????? /????????
In other news I probably accidentally threw out an $100 check today
I FOUND IT….aT THE bottom of the trash can.
sometimes i remember
and i cant stop laughing to myself